Transitions!

I have a grandson who has trouble transitioning from one activity to another. He becomes so comfortable doing "one thing" that to stop that activity and change "gears" brings out the "uglies" in him. I am beginning to think he inherited that trait from his Nani. Now I know what many of you might be saying about now, "You have got to be kidding. Who has transitioned into and out of more places and situations than you have in the 6 years of living full time in an RV, not to mention previous years living in China, as well as now having children you visit around the globe?" My comeback to you would be that yes, I have been through many transitions but it has not always been comfortable. If it were not for Hunter, the true adventurer, and his constant positive attitude and daily encouragement you might have seen more "uglies" coming out of me. I have come face to face with this truth just recently when I had to tackle the task of moving back into the RV. My new little home in Indiana has become so comfortable, like a soft warm sweater, a cup of hot tea, and a fall sunset. Why change that? Why transition back into tight quarters, little counterspace, no friendly neighbors? As Hunter would respond: WARM SUNSHINE!

Now that we are officiallly in Florida and enjoying that warm sunshine I would agree that the work of moving and the transition itself was well worth it. 

I am struggling, though, with a transition that is much harder than moving clothes from one place to another or endurin jet lag or even adjusting to living in another culture. That is the transition from being in the "middle age" bracket to entering the "old age" category of life. It is, of course, inevitable for us all but that does not mean it is easy or even welcomed! What happened to the body that could play racquetball, memorize parts in a play, watch movies until 11:00, eat greasy pizza and sugary pop without a stomach ache?

Are those days really gone? What manual gives us a step by step procedure to make this transition easier? Bo Caldwell writes in his book, City of Tranquil Light, "This growing old is the great test, you know-the challenge we've been preparing for all along." If that is the case I need to "rise to the occasion." Look into God's word, feast on it and apply its truth. 

Isaiah 43:18-21 speaks directly to this struggle: 

"Forget the former things, do not dwell in the past. See, I am doing a new thing. Now, it is springing up. Do  you not see it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the desert to give drink to my people, the chosen ones, the ones I have formed for myself, so that they may proclaim my praise."

OK. The purpose in entering that "old age" group is, through aches, pains, foggy brain, sore joints, through no matter what the body can or can not do - to give God praise!

1 Corinthians 1:3

"All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort."

Home

There is an old saying: "Home is where the heart is." I believe there is much truth to this adage. When we lived full time in our RV we used to say:"Home is where we park it". Living in the various houses of our children for some period of time caused me to coin the phrase: "Home is where the grandchildren live". But now that we finally have a small house in a retirement community I am beginning to feel that home is once again a stationary building with walls, a cement driveway, and a red front door with a welcome mat. I invite all my blog friends to visit us in Indianapolis but in case you never travel this way here are a few photos.

Our home is not very big but it feels so comfortable and fills me with a real sense of warmth and peace. It is a special gift from God. It is like the peace that only He can offer His children. Jesus said to his disciples before he returned to heaven; "Peace I leave with you. My peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your heart be troubled and do not be afraid. " John 14:27

As the sun streams through my bedroom window while I do my morning devotions I feel His peace and know I do not have to be troubled about anything because HIs peace covers me. 

"Pilgrim was taken to a large upper room that faced the sunrise. And the name of the room was Peace." from Pilgrim's Progress

Powerful quote!

I recently completed a novel of historical fiction called "The Preacher's Bride" written by Jody Headlund. It is the tale of the second wife of John Bunyan, author of "Pilgrim's Progress". The story, although fiction in nature, is based on historical facts gleaned from the authors's hours of pain staking searching out and reading a variety of historical records. Elizabeth Bunyan was the step-mother of four small children left motherless by the early death of Mary Bunyan. Elizabeth labored for 7 days, yes 7 days, giving birth to John's still born son. She had to provide a meager living for these children and herself while John was imprisoned for preaching the gospel of Jesus Christ, during which he wrote "Pilgrims's Progress", one of literature's greatest works! Elizabeth suffered much but kept her eyes on Jesus, her Lord and Savior. One quote from this book has had a profound impact on my view of hardships:

"Hardships are the Lord’s greatest blessing to the believer. Without them we would love the Lord only for what He does for us. Our troubles teach us to love Him for who He is.”

I would recommend this novel as an enjoyable read but even more so to take to heart the quote above, whose truth echoes through the pages of God's word!

Struggling through gravel...

Recently Hunter and I rode our tandem in southern France on a bike/boat tour through the Provence area; dotted with the white horses of Carmague, winding river canals, fields of sunflowers, tiny French villages, and traces of Van Gough and Nostradamus. It was an enjoyable week of bike riding during the day and fellow shipping with other bikers on the boat in the evenings while feasting on French and Italian cuisine.

(Note the photos below)

One insident on the first day's ride was less than favorable and reminded me of aspects of my spiritual and physical journey.

Hunter and I ride a road bike, translated means one fit with "skinny" tires best suited for paved roads. We avoid dirt and rough roads for stability reasons and to protect our tires as well as to maintain a cleaner chain to prevent shifting problems. In fact, we own individual dirt bikes for just such occasions. But in traveling we only take our road tandem. Therefore, when our tour guide led us on a "new" route the first day, one NOT advertised in the trip description, which consisted of miles of gravel we were not, shall we say, "happy campers"! It was a struggle to ride resulting in long distances of simply getting off the bike and pushing it over the large gravel areas. Have you ever walked for a distance on gravel in clip-in bike shoes? If not, you have missed a special kind of torture! I distinctly remember trudging along with sweat running down my jersey gazing down the road thinking will this never end? It only complicated the problem when we realized we were lost with no guide "up ahead"! We had little choice but to forge ahead and finally did locate a small paved road that eventually connected our "lost" party with the main group, much to our relief. 

Some days I feel like I am "walking through gravel" as I try to cope with scoliosis back pain and tremors that NEVER stop! What happened to the smooth paved roads of youth or even middle age when I could dive for a racquet ball, bounce babies on my hip, chase little boys through the park? I mourn the loss of energy and an agile, pain free body. There are moments when I admit I just want to lie down in the gravel and feel sorry for myself but then I remember that verse in Isaiah 41:13-

"For I am The Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, "Do not fear (or be discouraged, or give up, or feel sorry for yourself) I will help you.""

 In contrast to the guide on our bike ride who did not do his job of planning the perfect route or of preventing us from getting lost, Jesus DOES plan the perfect route for each of our lives and we can be assured we will never get lost following his leading. 

God is sovereign. Whatever circumstance He allows to cross our path is another brush stroke on our life canvas. He truly knows what is best for His children. We may someday see the reason for the struggle or we may not. Our gravel experience on the bike certainly made our tour guide more aware of the future road surfaces and taught him to keep his group together to avoid any more "lost sheep"! So, I guess it was all for the best!

My Parkinson's struggle or whatever struggle you are facing will "work together for good" in God's timing  and for His glory. Our heavenly tour guide knows the perfect route for each of us and He is trustworthy!

One on One

Recently I had the opportunity to spend a few hours "one on one" with one of my eight grandchildren, Aiden. He spent the night at our home. Together we went swimming at the club's pool. Since he is just learning to swim he clings on to me pretty tightly but I am still able to teach him a few important swimming "tips". There was another 5 year old at the pool and she had diving sticks and loaned some to Aiden. Caustiously he watched her drop them and swim down to the bottom and retrieve them. This he wanted to do but has not mastered the "technique" of overcoming the water's bouancy by using your arms to propel you to the bottom. So I explained that if he wanted I could push him to the bottom and he could grab a diving stick then the water would pop him up to the surface. At first mention of this idea he was fearful. But his desire to "get the treasure" overwhelmed his fear, as well as the fact that he trusted me to protect him and get him safely to the surface. So finally he agreed to allow me to push him deeper and when I did he grabbed the diving stick and popped to the surface wearing a huge grin and eyes that said "I did it!"

As I have spent "one on one" time with Jesus lately He has shown me that He wants to push me deeper to grab spiritual truths. Do I trust Him enough? That question has been echoing in my mind lately as I face continued health issues. "Do I trust you enough, Jesus, to let you "push" me through the dark waters? Will you be there to pull me up so I can breath?" I know the answer to that question. Of course He will be there. He loves me and wants only the best for me. I know that "My flesh and my heart may (will) fail but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever." Ps. 73:26

But I still struggle with fear so I guess, like Aiden, I just need to take the plunge and remember Isaah 43:2 "When you pass through the water I will be with you, and through the rivers they shall NOT overflow you."! 

Some of the greatest treasures in my life are my 8 grandchildren. Thank-you, Jesus!

P.S. My heart was so heavy as I learned of the death of Robin Williams, especially as I learned that we "shared" as early diagnosis of Parkiinson's Disease. I wish I could have shared two Bible passages with him:

"And God is faithful. He will not allow you to be tested beyond what you can bear but will with the testing provide a way to escape that you will bear up under it."  1 Cor. 10:13

"Come unto me all you who are weary and heavy laden and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." Matthew 11:27-28

Hands!

Have you ever stopped to just look at your hands? They reveal a few of our "secrets". Age spots, wrinkles, and occasional crooked fingers tell us we are aging. Wedding bands proclaim our lasting relationships. For me resting hand tremors whisper "you have Parkinson's Disease". Generally I can ignore the annoying shaking but recently I have had to do psycological battle with the reality that these tremors will be my lifelong companions whether or not I have invited them to stay! Like unwanted house guests they have gone from being just annoying, to frustrating, and on to causing me to scream: "How can I get rid of them?" Aside from trying mind altering drugs the tremors are "forever"! OK. Now how to cope with the shaking everytime you rest in front of the TV, or pick up a novel to read, or try to concentrate on a church sermon, or hold hands, or the most difficult-fall asleep at night while the pillow shakes under your head. I have tried sitting on them, crossing my arms, clenching my fists. Nothing stops their relentless shaking. If it is a battle I can't win can I then just learn to survive?

God has been speaking to me through this trial. He wants me to grow in my level of perseverance: "Consider it pure joy, whenever you face trails of many kinds. Because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance." James 1:2-3

But He does not just leave me to figure it out on my own. Just the other day during a low period I simply wrote in my prayer journal, "Help me!" He used the kind words of a friend in a wheel chair who struggles with MS to encourage me.. He used my husband's big shoulders to allow me a good cry. He "showed" me how to raise my hands during my prayer time to worship. (It is amazing but the hands don't shake if I raise them high reaching out to God.) Finally, He gently explained that at night when I lay down to sleep concentrate not on the shaking hands but rather concentrate on reciting as many Bible verses as I can and then pray for others. In doing that I have found my body relaxing and I am more able to fall asleep. (The hands stop their tremors when I sleep, thankfully!) 

Now, when I look at my shaking hands I think of God's steady hands. The Bible tells me HIs hands are mighty, all sufficient, protecting and supporting. Above all, I can hold his hand and not fear knowing He will help me!

Isaiah 41:13 "For I am The Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear, I will help you."

P.S. On a lighter side I just love this quote from the mother of a special needs child:

"Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and proclaiming, "Whew, what a ride!"

Photo of the "perfect" caregiver!

During my recovery from knee replacement surgery Hunter has been a model caregiver. Before my surgery we discussed our "roles" and he claimed peanut butter and jelly would be the "special of the day" MOST meals with an occasional boiled hot dog thrown in for variety as he took over the kitchen. The bed would go unmade but he would be around for emotional support. 

In reality I was served meals like the one you see pictured!

He was always available for much needed advice and emotional encouragement, running errands, assisting with changing clothes, around the clock pain med and ice pack "runs", and taxi service to PT and Dr. appointments. 

The kitchen, in fact the entire house, was kept in immaculate condition. He became the ultimate "butler". 

Now that I am mobile I have reclaimed the kitchen but I miss his special "touches". He did enjoy trying his hand at creating with food so now I am finding him more often wanting to try out an "idea". His expertise is the grill but today found him perfecting his noodle making skills.

He will always be the master of CLEAN, thankfully. 

Thank-you, dear, for making my recovery tolerable and continuing to be my God-given helpmate walking through life hand in hand. I couldn't "do it" without you! Love you!

"Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails!" 

1 Corinthians 13:7-8